it would be even better, with a gesus tag on that bitch.

 

there are 2 mateo's?

 

word.



we need some mods to sit with us bs benchies!

and i jsut know of mateo and mateo jr.?

 

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ill play you dirty lil games

 

i should hang from the exit sign. mwah.

 

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hehe...a lil' squirrel

 

the bench is getting better!



yay a squirrel!

wait.. a squirrel?

 

i was at a little tunnel thing today by the freeway and im almost 100% sure i saw a fetus of some sort

 

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(its an oar fish)
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my fam fam :wub:
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jaylyn
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"Cross my hart and hope to die, Stick a needle in my arm
praise the hevens, call the cops... relax theres no cause for alarm"
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"good night for you bad night for me,
but i still love you lying down k-i-s-s-i-n-g
not bad, not bad, not bad, not bad"
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"Zero Star Hotel"
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"fight for the right to remain silent..
one false move thats all she wrote..."

end this randomism spree with my man bad willy (emcee Mylk an cookies)after sex


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ges you make me laugh.

 

Why?



"theres nothing more beautiful then a womans tears"

 

will tears of laughter do?
you'll have to wait till my time of month to get any other tears.
unless you want to make me cry.

 

This almost made me cry....

i got this in my email from one of my Ex;s

How you been treating the world, (Gesus)? Hopefully better than it treats you. I'm just sitting and thinking, kinda wanting to write, but I do not have anything new to say. (Person A) is gonna be back tomorrow night, I miss him, I think he wants to marry me. I dunno. I think I am lonely and I would settle and lie for the rest of my life. I feel like I will never have anything else. I will always be pretending and laughing at the mirror. A fake smile and it is the only thing that makes him smile. I know that I make the choices for myself, but I think if I left him, I would never find anyone who adores me like he seems to. I do not want to love someone more than they love me, I could not bare the thought. I would rather lie than be loved less. I think I am a failure, I think I am my mother, I think I am still 13 and my father is beating me and calling me fat. I think I will be empty like I am now, but more full with my own loathing than I could ever admit. I am like those people who want attention so bad, but do not want anyone to know how bad I hurt. I do not feel sorry for myself. I am grateful that I was beat. I wouldn't want my mother to love me. If I could go back I would still eat 2 bottles of asprin and throw up for hours just to feel the ache. I would keep all my scars. I do not care so much. I worry too much. I think I have a beautiful face, but I could stand to lose 10 pounds. I like my feet. I do not like anyone else's feet. I eat too many diet pills. I think I will die young and smiling. I wanna go out nice and quite. Sleeping. Dreaming. Laughing at the mirror. I'd just shake my finger and say, "You did not beat me." I won, I guess, in the end.

 

i bet it did.

to hear that from a close friend whom you shared a relationship with must be hard to swallow. you jsut want to hold them, and make them feel secure.

How did you respond to that ges?

 

okay gesus you got my tears now....that was the saddest thing i have ever heard/read for a long time.

I dont know what to say for once.....

she doesnt look too happy in the picture you posted......is she constantly unhappy.

i just want to hug you both....but that cannot be.

you sent a good response to her ges, that will make her happier i hope. it would me if i was feeling the way she does.

how old is she?

oh dear...i feel so depressed now.

p.s you have pretty eyes gesus.

 

theres no responce that you should hae to that... i tryed to make it that way, but she'll find a way to respond even if its months from now...

in that picture i posted was when i was talking about the trips back home and the dirty lil secrets... those eyes from her said ill never forget this/ill never tell.... and that how we return to each other time and time again.... she is unhappy when every shes not with me, shes been in love with me sence she was in 3rd grade.... now here we are both adults both faced with life... fuck that was so long ago...
big it up for the early 90's
but the responce will make her happy, happier then her boy friend ever will.... but she'll return sad once she thinks about how its him not me then ill get a late night call crying that ends in both of us sleeping on the phone

shes 18 now... and dont feel depressed theres a happy ending to this story....

and thanks you my eyes are amazing personally all the colors in them from purple to blue to green to yellow and red.... they've always been somethign that stands out even in black and white.... but thanks so much